okay, we’re officially married
My grandpa has Alzheimer’s so he has no idea who my grandma is but everyday for the last three or four months he brings her in flowers from their garden and asks her to run away with him and be his wife and everyday she says she already is and everyday the smile my grandpa gets on his face is the most beautiful heartfelt thing I have ever seen.
- How to meet celebrities: Write a book that's good enough to become a movie.
are there actually people out there who make their beds every morning or is that just a myth
- Me: WHO THE FUCK TOOK MY oh there it is
- teacher: c'mon guys! you did this in 3rd grade!
- student: i don't even remember what i had for dinner last night you fucking whore